I’m knee deep right now in a bible study on Esther by Beth Moore. Its an amazing bible study and I’m really enjoying every minute of it. This past Tuesday we had Session 4. Every session Beth gives us a different bullet point and this weeks was “It’s tough being a woman in the tight fist of fear” Were in the section of Esther chapter 4 where Esther is being asked by Mordecai to go to the king and plea on behalf of her people knowing that if she does she could die and if she doesn’t she and all her people will die.
In chapter 4 you can see how Esther went from a mindset of self preservation to “if I perish, I perish”. When Esther was asked to go before the king she was given a choice. She had to overcome herself in order to do what God had created her and positioned her to do “for such a time as this”
What this session really dealt with me on is fear. I have lived a life of living in fear. You can become so scared of the fear of death you never live an abundant life. I don’t want this!! I want to live and I want to live the abundant life I know that God has for me. I don’t want the shadow of death to be so perilous in my life that it becomes worse than death itself.
Beth also talked about conditional faith and conditional trust in God. This is something that God has really been dealing with me on as well. With health issues its so easy for your faith to be built up so much on a miracle of God rather than God himself. I need to build my trust and faith in Him and not just his manifestations.
So how do we do this? How do I do this? Can you imagine living a life free of the fear of death? Living a life of destiny way beyond the casket and all the way to the kingdom!!
We should do like Esther did and face our fear head on. Does that mean we are not afraid, no of course not. It just means we choose courage. Courage isn’t the absence of fear but making the choice to face your fear because you know there is more at stake. Esther chose to take the courage that was offered to her.
Proverbs 31:10 talks about a woman of noble character. That word “noble” means courageous. I want to be a woman of courageous and noble character. I’m ready to live a life where fear can no longer manipulate me.
To do this I also need to change how I see death. Death is NOT my end it is truly the beginning. I want to embrace this life an the time that I have here for all that I can. I want to learn and grow and develop so that those things can be applied in my eternal life.
I’m no longer going to live in the shadow of death!!!
So also I need to apply the concept that courage is not denial. When I am dealing with a health issue courage isn’t denying I have a headache but choosing to not let that headache have any authority or victory over me.
These shifts in my thought pattern and mentality I know will bring great freedom to me and to my life. I’m so ready to walk in that freedom. I wrote this blog so that I can look back and reflect on my declarations. I know I have an amazing journey ahead of me and I know I will be tested so I want this blog the help me with that.
So with that i say the same “if I perish, I perish”
And if my biggest fears happen, then the only answer is GOD!
if_________, then God!!!!
*all of this blog comes from direct bullet points in Esther by Beth Moore.